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To put it simply, adolescence is a defining phase that takes your kid from childhood to adulthood. It is during this phase that your son or daughter starts bonding with peers, experimenting with new beliefs, trying various styles, falling in love for the first time, figuring out what he or she wants to be, exploring different ideas and dreaming of a fascinating future. While all these happen, it is only natural to expect a sea change in your child’s behavior. And how you react to it as a parent will determine how your child emerges from the adolescence stage.

First of all, it is important for you to stay calm. Please realize that your child cannot remain as that cute, dear, innocent angel forever. There is an exciting world out there, and your child is getting ready for it. Just accept adolescence as a biological, a psychological and emotional transformation that lays the platform for your child’s adulthood. As a parent this awareness will give you practical solutions for handling your child’s raging passions during adolescence.

How open your child is to you depends on how open you are as a parent. You might consider yourself to be a friendly and an understanding parent. You might think that your child is sharing everything with you. But, in all probabilities, your child is telling you only what you are happy to hear, and not what he / she really feels. Well, you need to be a friendly parent for your child to be truthful to you. It is from your reactions to their feelings that they decide to share true lies or the truth alone.

The beginning of parental wisdom is ‘listening’. Do not build a wall between you and your child by denying the freedom of expression. Acknowledge what your child wants to say, and that will encourage your child to be more transparent to you. Instead of criticism, use guidance. State the problem, not the person. When angry, use ‘I’ and not ‘You’. For instance, ‘I like a clean room’ works better than ‘You have messed up your room’. Likewise, praise specific acts and efforts of your child without evaluating character traits.

And always remember that your composure will make a huge difference in shaping your child’s adolescence.  

AGAM ParentSpace
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